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Founder & Writer
Sonny (Sonia) Oram

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A.D.

Courtney (petite menswear)

Rae (Tailoring)

Raimi & Lee (hair)

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Customization Design by Sonia Oram

20

May

experiencetheroo asked: Hey Sonny! Loved your review on the GabiFresh fatkinis. My question to you is what size do you feel should be the cut off since they claim to have swimsuitsforall?

Thanks! That’s a really good question. I think they really just need to change the name, because you’re always going to leave someone out if you call it Swim Suits For All. It was brought to my attention that the 24 cut-off was a problem when I read about it on a fat activist blog (Now I can’t remember what it was! It may have been thisisthinprivilege.tumblr.com) so I gathered they were leaving out a large portion of the plus sized population. But I don’t personally have the knowledge to say what size they should go up to.

I appreciated cristinamarieme.tumblr.com’s comment: “The company itself goes up to 34, but for some reason has decided to only release the GabiFresh line up to 24. My hope is that because they seem to have had such a small release of the line (most are already sold out, and apparently there was only a 3 month production window), and the popularity of them will encourage more swim suits made in larger sizes for either the next release (if it happens) or other lines.”

- Sonny

(re: GabiFresh Swimsuits for All (Unless you’re larger than size 24))

Anonymous asked: Hi! I recently rediscovered your blog and it's still awesome. I noticed you changed your name and said something about not being a lady. I'm still pretty ignorant on the genderqueer/trans front but I'm just wondering what pronouns do you use/how do you identify now?

You are a dahl for asking. I identify as genderqueer and feel that neither a male nor female identity fits me. If we were to simplify gender onto a two dimensional plane, I’d lie somewhere near the middle. But in a multidimensional world, I think I exist somewhere far off from male/female, possibly even as far away as they are from one another. I haven’t felt the need to stray from female pronouns, but love my new name Sonny. I also identify as someone who was socialized female and feel strongly connected to the female experience, though at times I step outside of it. I feel in accordance with some parts of my body and out of touch with other parts. In terms of my mind, I’m faggy, nurturing, affectionate, sensitive, emotional, but also very logical. Maybe this will all change tomorrow, but it’s where I’m at now!

Hope ya’ll are having a fantastic day. 

Sonny

16

May

Anonymous asked: Thanks to you guys I found out how awful Urban Outfitters is. I had actually recently ordered black pants from them because I needed work pants. But then my conscience got to me and I sent them back and wrote as my return reason: "your company donates to anti equality campaigns. I will know longer support you because you do not support me." I know I can't afford to be the perfect consumer, but it's good to know some basic ways I can make a difference.

Yesss! Good for you!

05

May

Cislady binding

Anonymous asked: I have been thinking that I might want to experiment with binding, but I’m feeling really confused and new about it. I am a cislady and I dress fairly femme, and I’m not sure how reducing my books would affect the fit/look of my clothes. I also have ABSOLUTELY no idea where to start/how to go about it. And I don’t know how to respond to people asking me about it. basically I just feel really lost.

Can I just say that I <3 you? You summed up the human experience so beautifully in this question. 

Fit of your clothes: If you are wearing cislady clothes, there may be some extra room in the chest area. Some lady clothes are built for larger racks, or meant to enhance the look of them knockers. For others, it doesn’t really matter what your blinkers look like, because it will just hang.

image

(from: shopbop.com)

This top is totally cute and femme, and would look great on a variety of chest sizes.

image

Modcloth may as well have called it the “Look at my boobs dress.” Aside from the fact that part of it is see-through, you might be left with some unfilled cups.

I’ve become more comfortable with the idea of wearing lady tops once I started binding, because they now fit in a way I’m comfortable with. I’m less concerned with only buying shirts that hide my chest. I’m confident you will find things that look great if your current collection doesn’t work for you.

Brands and binding safety: I’ve tried a few different brands, and the Underworks Tri-top Chest Binder works the best for me. I’ve heard less awesome things about T-Kingdom, although one reader on Autostraddle wrote, “it was nice to have the velcro when i first started binding because it made it easy to put on and to adjust tightness while i was getting used to binding.” I also recently tried the Buckle Elastic Chest Breast Binder at sohoeva.com and it was kind of a joke. Did nothing for me.

Chestbinders.wordpress.com also has pages of comprehensive binder reviews.

Binders should feel a little too tight when you first try them, and then adjust over the next few days. But if you can’t breath it’s too tight! Ace bandages are dangerous, and you want to make sure to take your binder off at night to give those books some time to breath. If you live in an area where you can find a trans friendly health care provider, you should find one who you feel comfortable talking to about binding. Just google the name of your city + trans friendly health care provider. (You don’t have to be going through a transition to see these doctors. It is just the easiest wording to find what you are looking for on the web.) 

Responding to people about it: Changing the subject, or “I don’t like talking about my undergarments,” seems good to me. But seriously you guise, you never have to say anything. People often think they have a right — especially with women and trans* folk — to talk about their bodies. As if your body is their’s to comment on and approve of. If you want to bind, that’s enough reason to bind. You need no other reason, and you never have to talk to anyone about it. If someone asks you where your headers went, you can tell that that’s an inappropriate question. Like, even if it’s your best friend.

People like to try to understand our gender choices, and their need to understand can make us feel like we shouldn’t do anything we can’t explain. Talking to people you trust is great, but people you trust will accept whatever explanation you want. “I’m binding because I want to,” should be all you have to say in order to get their support.

I’m really proud of you. Embarking on binding for the first time can be totally overwhelming, but just keep looking for ones that fit. Hopefully you have some queers in your community to talk to about it too. You’re gonna be great, kid!

- Sonia

—-

Hay Boston: hairdids and nails today! woooo!! If you still need the address, email me: sonia@qwearfashion.com.

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03

May

kaebot asked: I'm sorry if this is answered elsewhere but where did you get the black and floral pattern hat in your recent post about everlane? It's really great! (I love Qwear so much, btw. Thank you so much!)

Yayyy. No worries— I got it at Forever 21 for 8 bucks! Love that thing. It’s shaped to fit on your head slightly off to the side. I don’t see it on their website, but I got it at their store on Newbury in Boston. Thanks for the love!

- Sonia

(Re: Everlane: Soft, Luxurious, and Easy on the Wallet)

02

May

Anonymous asked: First, I LOVE your blog. Second, my question (or should I say "qwestion?"): I have a pretty big chest (40D), and I'd like to find a bra that will "tone it down." Do you have recommendations? Thanks!

Thanksss! I did a flattening sports bra round-up last year that I think should help! Check out the comments too, as many folks had good additions (any hopefully more to come!)

- Sonia

28

Apr

Anonymous asked: Any blog recs for a curvy girl? I'm not overweight by any stretch of the imagination, but I definitely do have a fuller chest and booty, and so many tomboyish styles seem better suited to girls with a flatter figure. I'm not trying to hide my body or make it look different, I'm just looking for tomboy styles that might compliment me.

I often feel that there is not enough representation of people in the middle ground, including those who like tomboy styles but want to maintain their curvy physique. If you scroll through our “submission” tag, you may find styles you identity with. I really like I Dream Of Dapper’s style because she does menswear in a feminine way. She’s been taking some inspiration from Esther Quek lately; who wears suits closely tailored to her feminine frame. Also check out the Tomboy/Femme Tumblr and Genderqueer Fashionista. The company I work for, Fourteen, sells suits “standard” fits in addition to “boy” fits and you might enjoy checking out their stuff. 

Any more ideas, friends?

In other news, I’m being super swank today and camping out in a hotel right by the Dalloway, counting the minutes until I get ready for tonight’s Power Clashing party! Did I mention Kim Stolz is coming?? 

- Sonia

11

Apr

Anonymous asked: I'm a "bridesmaid" in a wedding this fall. My best friend from 6th grade is the bride; we're still close but no longer BFF. She's totally down with me wearing a suit, but I'm bored with black and grey. I want to match the color of the bridesmaids dresses: bright orange, pink and blue (poppy, azalea, and cobalt, shall we say?) Any leads on where a teensy queermo can find a bright colored suit with menswear tailoring that doesn't look like something a career girl would wear to the office? Thanks!

Topman has amazing suit colors and their sizes will fit all the tiny queermos! - Sonia

Teal Cotton Skinny Suit

Teal Cotton Skinny Suit, at Topman for $400

09

Apr

Anonymous asked: do you have any recommendations for reasonably priced and reputable binders?

I’m actually interested in finding someone to guest blog on the topic; not just on recommended brands, but safe binding practices. Anyone up for it? Email me: sonia@qwearfashion.com! Until then, here’s a post I did a while back that covers everything I know on the subject.

I just started binding full time with Underworks Tri-top Chest Binder. I found myself in-between the medium and large, so I’m wearing the large. I’m not sure if $30 + shipping is what you’d consider reasonably priced. Hope to get you some more information soon! - Sonia

Anonymous asked: Hi! I was wondering if you guys could help me find a dress shirt for petites. I'm 5'2" and my collar size is about 13". I would like one that fits my collar so I can wear my bow tie nicely.

Courtney says:

Nice button-up shirts can be very hard to find in small sizes, and even if you find a small size, men’s shirts off the rack tend to have more billowy arms to account for musculature. So if you’re going for men’s, arm length and width probably won’t fit exactly. That being said, I have several men’s dress shirts that I think fit me well enough for small qualms like these (I am 5’ 2”, 120). Tailoring is also always an option. In looking at men’s dress shirts, always look for slim fit. There are also many good women’s options if you’re going for a more feminine or androgynous look.  

My best-fitting dress shirt is a men’s x-small from Topman. The sleeves are slimmer and shorter, and the shoulders and general fit are excellent. Topman also offers xx-small sizes.

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Topman: Heather Blue Smart Shirt, $40

My next best fitting shirts are from H&M. They have racks on racks of dress shirts in every country I’ve been to, usually for pretty decent prices. Though their quality isn’t the best, they have a wide selection, and the fit/price makes up for that for me. The ones I wear aren’t even x-small, actually; just smalls in slim fit. I also highly recommend H&M boys’ button-ups, I have two in 13-14yr and one in 14+, and they all fit me perfectly, as well as being built of heftier cloth.

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H&M Men’s: Slim Fit Shirt, $19.95

The best women’s dress shirts I have ever found were from J.Crew.  They’re expensive, but they occasionally turn up in thrift stores, and are definitely worth it. They have a nice androgynous look to them in certain fits, and are a favorite of my femme-menswear darling. They also come in petite sizes, which is always pleasant.

image

J.Crew Women’s: Stretch Perfect Shirt, $75

Back in my women clothes wearing days, I also used to have good luck with American Eagle women’s button-ups. Femme-menswear master-thrifter darling likes to thrift anything that fits.

Good luck, and happy styling!

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