Sonny Oram and Lia on 10 Years of Qwear and Beyond
Qwear’s Founder & Co-Owner Sonny Oram and Qwear’s 13-year-old trans youth advocate Lia addressed everyone with speeches on the last day of pride to commemorate 10 years of Qwear! Watch the speech and read the transcript below.
Speech from Sonny Oram, Qwear Founder & Co-Owner:
Hello everyone! Thank you all for tuning in to celebrate Qwear’s 10 year anniversary with us!!
10 years ago, when I was a 22-year-old blogging from my bedroom, I never thought I’d be addressing all of you today. On June 11 2011, I published my very first article on dykeduds.com, which later became Qwear Fashion. A few years later, the queer fashion movement exploded. And we’re not going to take credit for that, but we’re not going to not take credit for that either.
At this time in my life, I didn’t have a safe space in the physical world to explore my identity and physical presentation. I’d been forced to wear clothes from the girl’s department my whole life, which I absolutely hated. It got to the point where I’d rather die than put on another dress. So when I finally tried on clothes from the boy’s department, it was like absolute euphoria. Finally, I looked in the mirror and said: this is ME. I wanted everyone to be able to experience that feeling of wearing an outfit that makes you feel like you’re on top of the world. I decided to create a safe space virtually, where we could all gather together on one platform, and exchange ideas on the topic of queer fashion.
A lot of people laughed at me when I told them I had a queer fashion platform. The idea of queer people looking good was funny to them. But queer people understood why we needed this and it was because of YOU. Because of our readers, I kept going.
“A lot of people laughed at me when I told them I had a queer fashion platform.”
I really felt I didn’t know what I was doing at all. I mean, do any of us really? But I had a vision of a community space with diverse voices. People wrote in to tell us what they wanted to see, and that helped make my vision a reality. So I want to give a huge thank you to everyone who read our articles and wrote in. You helped make Qwear what it is today.
I soon realized that I was just one voice and there were so many other voices out there. I poked around the internet for team members to join me in this vision, in particular people with different experiences than my own. With the recent invention of hashtags in social media, we could now find each other as a community. Queer fashion enthusiasts like Sam Murray, Courtney, Blake, Bing Bingham, Sean Lewis, and others were supporting the platform by creating incredible content that provided great advice as well as a more critical look of fashion’s role in our lives as queer people.
Then I met someone very special, my partner Rupi, who said, “Hey, let’s make Qwear more political,” To which I said, “Would you like to be our Fashion Director? Also, I love you.” With Rupi on board, we grew from just creating written content and photoshoots to fashion shows. We brought on the amazing photographer Jaypix Belmer, Blessitt Shawn, Sarah Rose, Lia, who you will hear from soon, Yasmin Benoit, and countless others. Rupi brought our mission to life. Together, we grew Qwear into the safe space it is today.
“The safe space aspect of Qwear is what stands out to us as the characterization of this amazing platform we have cultivated together.”
In fact, the safe space aspect of Qwear is what stands out to us as the characterization of this amazing platform we have cultivated together. Qwear Fashion is where the fashion trends start. As history unfolds, people will look to Qwear Fashion as documentation of the development of queer style over the years. People will look to Qwear Media as a company that helped normalize queerness in advertising and fashion as something beautiful and desirable. We’ve already been used as a resource by healthcare organizations, colleges around the world, and we’ve been quoted in books such as “Beyoncé in Formation: Remixing Black Feminism” by Omise'eke Natasha Tinsley. an incredible book and a huge honor.
I’d like to share a few of my personal favorite memories from Qwear. Our first fashion show at Queer Fashion Week in 2015 was extremely hectic but some of the most fun I’ve ever had. Models and designers gathered from all over the world for this landmark event: it was the first-ever Queer Fashion Week. Rupi decided to do something revolutionary and design clothing around the models, rather than the other way around. They hated how models were treated in the fashion industry — more like walking mannequins than people. Rupi wanted to create something inspired by the models’ own personal styles and desires to have the most authentic fashion experience possible. So we brought 2 huge suitcases from Boston of all these fabrics and half-made designs and clothes. We met our 13 models. Rupi measured them and picked out styles with them. And then spent 3 days in the hotel sewing and putting together outfits. By the end, our hotel room looked like a bomb had gone off in a fabric store. There were pieces of fabric and string everywhere. I loved seeing the smiles on all our models' faces as they tried on their outfits designed specifically for them. It felt revolutionary.
We did our best to get the community what they needed. The most common question we received was from people who wanted to model and just couldn’t break into the industry, because they were queer, and didn’t fit into the box that the media insisted upon. So In 2019, with the help of Ev Evnen, we founded Qwear Media: a queer talent database and agency that is helping to bring more LGBTQIA+ representation in advertising and fashion.
I want to give a huge thanks to my co-owner Rupi, as Qwear would not be what it is today without them. Many, many people have supported Qwear over the years. I’d like to give a special thanks to, Ev Evnen, Jodi Miller, Patch Putterman, Courtney Stirn, Sam Marry, Bing Bingham, Blake Calhoun, Ashley Yielding, my grandparents, Dave and Coletta, Rupi’s mom, Rabbi Rim Mirowitz, Sam Murray, Jaypix Belmer, everyone who has ever contributed to Qwear, our Patreon supporters, and everyone who supported us over the years.
Anyone who has ever tried to start anything knows how hard it can be. In the beginning, I made a lot of mistakes. People got mad at me. I too was learning, and I learned from the community. You all held Qwear to the highest of standards, and that’s why it’s such an incredibly safe space today. It was the friends who cheered me on and stayed by my side who really got me through the first few years. Every time I wanted to give up, they were there to encourage me. It’s really thanks to friends like Karen Lowe, Sarah Champagne, Sofia Pellon, and others, for helping me process the emotions of turning my mistakes into successes. If you also have a vision for something great, don’t give up, and don’t let the haters get you down.
I’d like to give a special shout-out to our Patreon supporters. We see you and we appreciate you! For those who don’t know, Patreon is a monthly membership platform that allows people to fund the artists and activists they love. If you can spare a dollar or two each month, please support us on Patreon - it really makes a big difference for us. Every cent goes towards our operating costs and towards our writers, photographers, and models, who work hard to create the amazing content you see. As you know, the queer community faces disproportionate rates of unemployment and homelessness, so by supporting us you are giving directly to the LGBTQIA+ community. Become a patron today at patreon.com/qwear.
I can’t wait to see what the next 10 years of queer style have in store for us. With your help, we can make more amazing queer fashion moments happen! Thank you everyone so much for watching and spending Pride with us. Lots of love to you all.
Speech from Lia, Qwear Trans Youth Advocate:
Hi, I'm Lia and I am 13 years old, as of yesterday. I socially transitioned when I was four years old. Allegedly my mom said no the first couple of times I asked for girl clothes because she didn’t know I could transition that young. But, I don’t remember that.
I have a beautiful little baby dog. His name is Jack. He is 11 or 12 months old. I love to draw, to chill and socialize and I also like not to socialize sometimes. I built my own PC and used my own money for the parts. I get obsessed over the littlest things like my pride flag fan (I told my mom to buy get 50 of them but she hasn’t agreed, yet) .I just started to play the Euphonium in my school's band during the pandemic.
As the youngest person on the Qwear Fashion team I was obviously designated to talk about problems for the younger parts of the LGBTQ community, like school.
When I was in first grade I wanted to tell my class I was trans, you know the typical trans coming out story, so I asked my teacher if I could tell my classmates. She said NO. So in classic mom insanity revenge story, my parents rented out an entire bouncy house place and had a party there and I came out to my entire class, their families, my friends from dance and soccer and brownies. We made cupcakes (that were really good) and I started my brother's rainbow sour airhead addiction.
You may know that some people are trying to make it impossible for people to get puberty blockers and estrogen/testosterone, which I need because I have a puberty blocker myself and will get estrogen in a few years. You know, fun, adorable! I’m not old enough yet!
I would say laws trying to prevent medical treatment are inherently terrible. It should not be up to anyone else other than the trans person. It’s not your decision, it’s my decision. Trans women/men not being allowed to be on the team of the gender they identify as is not okay. Let me be on the girl’s team as a trans female. If I was forced to be on the boy’s team I would be understandably outraged and I would try to be transferred to the girls and my parents would fight with me, cause they’re great. Some people might not be successful because their family doesn’t support them and because some people are just cruel. We all need to fight those people and help make the situation better with all sports organizations.
“If I identify as a girl and want to be dressed in mismatched sweaters and sweatpants, I can. If you identify as a dude and you want to wear a dress, go right ahead! Don’t let the haters stop you from doing what you enjoy.”
I also came to address people who think gender norms are an actual thing: they’re not. If I identify as a girl and want to be dressed in mismatched sweaters and sweatpants, I can. If you identify as a dude and you want to wear a dress, go right ahead! Don’t let the haters stop you from doing what you enjoy. And if it’s not safe for you or you’re not ready, that’s ok too. Try to find an outlet rather it’s a person or stuffie, or whatever. Try to make the best of your situation. You don’t need the whole world on your side — you just need that one person. That’s all you need! If you can’t find a person, do what makes you happy like drawing or hitting water balloons with baseball bats! It’s really fun. Don’t let people impact you negatively. Go be you. Rule the world. And be your own YOU! Have fun with your one life.
